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June 19, 2014

When you arrive in the midst of my years, you reflect upon what was done and what was not done and of the quality of your life. I have lived a very rich, full life and I have done, in the main, every thing that I wanted to do. Most of my goals have been achieved without regret.

When I was 14 years old, my goal was to become a writer and teacher. I became both at an early age. I also wanted to see the world and so I travelled extensively and even lived in Europe for many years. I wanted the best of wives and after two tries I achieved that goal as well. As I approached my elder years, I constructed various “bucket lists” and scratched off each task one by one.

However, there remains in my heart one simple task that will elude me forever. All of life I wanted a daughter. After a failed first marriage and the birth of my son, I had high hopes of remarrying and helping bring into this world a little girl. Of one thing I was always certain: she would have the most beautiful of names, Chiara Appolonia Rizzi. I had chosen this name in my youth and the fact that no such sweet daughter exists haunts me a bit every day.

Of the Megans, Chelseas and Tiffanys, I would still prefer my Chiara Appolonia. Time is often a severe judge. Chiara Appolonia will not be by my side when I leave this world. Perhaps she will be there by the side of some other hopefull father years hence. I hope so.

Read author Allen E. Rizzi’s latest books available at

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From → Family, Italy, Travel

  1. Reblogged this on allenrizzi and commented:

    Rebloged from 6-19-2014 because Chiara was on my mind again tonight!


  2. Sweet! I also wanted Eleanor, but instead there was M, and then M. The first M eventually started fathering and here comes …. Alessio, then yeah, Alessandra! They live in Stockholm, their names are carefully chosen to match three nationalities (American, Swedish, and Italian).

    I don’t know how it happened, but nobody beats Alessio in my heart—of course my heart beats for Alessandra too, it actually accelerate the beats at the very thought of her—but Alessio!

    In Italy we say “al cuore non si comanda!”

    The point is that we never know what would have happened if life would go according to our wishes and plans. Sometimes, when I look back I find myself thinking that I’m grateful I didn’t have that wish granted!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Abbiamo sempre dentro di noi qualcosa di irrisolto che ci manca anche quando come tu scrivi sì ha avuto molto.
    Chiara è un nome bellissimo di una bellissima figura di donna che ha camminato nella fede con Francesco. Chiara la figlia di mio fratello ha compiuto il 3 dicembre 18 anni!
    I nomi dei propri figli vanno scelti con cura Eppure oggi la telenovela vince su tutto.

    Serene festività all the best for the New year 2019.

    Shera 🦋🌲🌲🌲🌷🌿

    Liked by 1 person

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